A Feral Life: One Last Nihilist Exposition

“Speaking of changes, lately I’ve begun imagining expressing my ideas and thoughts with more face to face interactions rather than through the medium of writing. I could surely do both, and have been for quite some time. But as I write this, I feel I have reached a point in my life where I am finding the activity of writing these texts as limiting as the very words themselves. It is fun and easy to do during the winter, or spontaneously during or after exciting experiences at riots, etc. But I think I am ready to shift my focus onto something else.

Over the years, I have made many accomplices and enemies with the circulation of my writing – these literary expressions of my thoughts, experiences, and ideas. And I am deeply moved by the kind things many of you have said – as well as the awful things too! Maybe I will pick up writing again if the desire overcomes my hesitation to open a computer and type in a coffee shop, or in a notepad under a bridge while waiting for a train, or during or after a riot – or even after an exhilarating heist! Maybe I will write again from within the confines of a prison cell – because really though, let’s be honest, how much damage to this industrial leviathan can one really do within the limitations of legality? How much freedom can one really reclaim without provoking those who benefit from enslavement? (But of course, I’ll do my best not to get caught!)

So to the readers of my writing, I bid you a literary farewell! If my writing has inspired you to think differently, it is only because you had the courage to read something unfamiliar to you in the first place. If any of my writing has encouraged you to live more freely, it was only because you possessed the power to reclaim your life and live on your own terms. On paper, I am Just an idea that you read aloud in your head with your own voice.”

A Feral Life_One Last Nihilist Exposition pdf

Oblivion: Anarchy & the Collapse of Industrial Civilization

From back cover:

“Of course, regardless of how myself or anyone else feels about industrial collapse, and whether or not people want to believe we can either prevent or accelerate it, industrial collapse is already happening, and has been for quite some time. Perhaps the reason why it’s gone unnoticed is either due to denial, or because the rate at which it’s collapsing doesn’t resemble a single, crumbling tower that quickly turns into ash and smoke. That is because something as large and socially complex as industrial society doesn’t break down all at once, but instead decomposes at different points and at different times. It is commonly understood as collapse due to an acknowledgement that as the natural resources needed to sustain industrial society are depleted, the points of decomposition break down beyond repair.”

“I can imagine a couple possible reasons why industrial collapse doesn’t cross the minds of many. One reason could be the socialized mentality of immortality driven by human supremacist arrogance. There are many people today – including leftists – who continue to put faith in science and technology as the saviors of life, and as a primary response to ecological disasters. At the root of this unwaivering faith is a refusal to acknowledge how science and technology have re-defined life by securing human-centric control over the wild. Science and technology, regardless of their greening continue to be the alphabet of industrialization – expanding power and influence through a language of increased alienation and ecological extinction. From military empowerment through the expansive production of weapons of mass destruction, to the tireless gaze of increased State surveilance over the population, science and technology never sleep. And as industrialization continues to absorb what remains of the wild world, the relationship to wildness erodes on both an individual and societal level.”

Oblivion_Anarchy & the Collapse of Industrial Civilization pdf

Fuck Around and Find Out: An Obituary for Victimhood

“Here, I reflect on a specific memory that involves physical abuse and sexual assault…

…after years of accumulated anger and despair, something changed. The line between life and death blurred as I stood up holding a chair over my head and screamed incoherently at a man who, for years, used my body for both sexual assault and various forms of corporal punishment. This man, who was supposed to be my father figure, my role model, my trusted best friend, slowly backed away. Today was the day he lost all power and control over me. For the first time there was fear in HIS eyes instead of mine, and years of childhood mental and physical abuse would cease forever.

It wasn’t until I became aware of my own violent potential that I experienced freedom. Despite being much smaller and weaker, I was no longer afraid. A new confidence had consumed me – one that could never be inspired by the protection of my Family, Community, or the State. Even the threat of imprisonment couldn’t subdue this deranged exhilaration. I waited. I waited for him to try again. I watched him poison himself with the usual gin, brandy, and beer combination, waiting for his drunken wrath to return. But it never did. My abandonment of victimhood hadn’t gone unnoticed. Almost as if he could smell his own pool of blood from an impending ambush attack in the night. The future was written. He was lucky to still be alive – and seemingly had no intentions on taking that gamble.”

Fuck Around and Find Out_An Obituary for Victimhood pdf

 

Toward Terra Incognita: A Critical Look at Cultural Essentialism, Nationalism, and Body Policing

“I feel nationalism has escaped the grave long enough. With this text I seek to instigate and encourage an anti-authoritarian flame that once and for all sets fire to its anarcho-confused, stumbling corpse. I also encourage anarchists to question the notion of any said thing belonging exclusively to any said culture, to question the notion that every individual identifying with said culture claims to own it, and to question the authority of whoever it is making universal claims on behalf of others in the first place.

I say normalize dreadlocks across all racial categories; rebel against work – especially the type of work that seeks to conform us to beauty standards of marketing and production! I say dismantle white supremacy by making whiteness as insubordinate to colonial order as every black and brown youth who light up precincts like bonfires to freedom!

I propose an anarchy that moves beyond the politics of embracing assigned identity, toward de-territorializing one’s body and destroying identity-based occupation all together. At the intersection of anti-colonial and anti-authoritarian praxis is a nihilist critique of any and all cultural ownership of one’s body, becoming a dangerous space of terra incognita.”

Toward Terra Incognita_A Critical Look at Cultural Essentialism, Nationalism, and Body Policing pdf

On Self-Love and Gun Power

From back cover:

“I remain an embodiment of insubordination, the fluidity of unbridled emotions, the nihilist poetry of a tsunami in flux. I do not sympathize with conforming to behavorial servitude in order to preserve the general peace of subordinating civility! Rather than pacify my outrage or silence my despair, I have put all of society’s shame­-on­-mes and peer pressures to rest in coffins lined up for a bonfire in my head. And during their incineration, I will look up to the stars with a smile of admiration, for they are a dazzling beauty beyond the reach of civilized governance.”

On Self-Love and Gun Powder pdf

KEEP SABOTAGING SHIT: Relating to the words of Winston “Boogie” Smith

From back cover:

“Y’all telling motherfuckers to come with they hands up and peacefully assemble? For what? Nah, fuck that, fuck that, fuck you, fuck them, fuck anybody who’s peaceful right now. Cuz when Martin Luther King was here we had a million motherfuckers marching saying let’s be peaceful, and now y’all still begging for y’all freedom, so they still shooting y’all down. They must want a war. So get y’all gasoline at y’all gas station.” – Winston “Boogie” Smith”

Keep Sabotaging Shit_Relating to the words of Winston “Boogie” Smith pdf

Egoist Vegan: Some Thoughts on an Individualist Animal Liberation

From back cover:

“If I am thoroughly an egoist, then I recognize the ego of others and the desire of that ego to not be controlled or dominated. I own nobody, and nobody owns me. This social relationship does not constitute a form of politics. Politics implies social governance guided by an external authority. My lifestyle is an anti­-politics ­ rejecting all anthropocentric power and authority constructed to govern my social interactions with other animals. My refusal to view non­human animals as “food” for consumption can easily be understood as a primal expression of this anti­-authoritarian lifestyle.”

Egoist Vegan_Some Thoughts on an Individualist Animal Liberation pdf

Destroy Race Destroy Society: Another Diary of Mayhem and Race Nihilism

From back cover:

“I am sure there will be some who will find this text redundant – another critique of identity. Fair enough. But allow me to be clear: I write this with the intent of further agitating identity politics by confronting the idea that Race is sacred and/or above criticism. My anti-fascist, anti-racist views recognize Race as nothing more than a social construct used to govern individuality. Despite attempts to personalize it with glory, cultural value, and meaning, Race continues to be just one of many phantoms woven into the fabric of social control and domination. My same desire to destroy white supremacy extends toward any and all racialized supremacist ideologies that attempt to take its place. So whether people call it “Post-Race Anarchy” or “Race Nihilism”, a critique of Race could be understood as a necessary re-wilding toward the rejection of civilized identity.”

Destroy Race Destroy Society_Another Diary of Mayhem and Race Nihilism pdf

Adulthood Is A Trap: Anti-Natalism, Youth Liberation, and a Refusal to Surrender

From back cover:

“What is it to love one’s self so thoroughly as to never surrender youthful play, dreaming, and imagination to the dusty bookshelves of fading memories?…

…Many formative years of youthful development and imagination are riddled with the bullet holes of coercion and emotional labor demanded by one form of authority of another. Any resistance comes with consequences intended to influence and shape one’s fear with precision. And in a subtle voice, the pressure of distant adulthood repeats a mantra; “grow up and get to work”…

…When I speak of “play”, I mean exactly as the word suggests: activity for personal enjoyment. And even though this word and its definition are commonly attributed to an exclusive age group, I say fuck that! There is nothing more deserving of the definition of play than the exhilerating experience of “acting out” against a society that demands life for its divine worship of work….”

Adulthood Is A Trap_Anti-Natalism Youth Liberation and a Refusal to Surrender pdf

A Dagger of Feral Anarchy

From back cover:

“For me, post-left anarchy is synonymous with anti-left anarchy. The “post” in post-left anarchy does not represent a ‘new’ or evolved form of leftism – as some would claim with various contemporary anti-state communist and socialist projects. Rather I use the phrase post-left anarchy to merely express a present frame of mind distinct from a past experience of having identified and engaged with leftist thinking. And from this perspective, anti is synonymous with post because it accurately expresses the nature of my present existence – my desire for individualistic, feral freedom – as antagonistic toward the civilizing order of leftism. For me, post-left anarchy does not mean some sort of alignment or sympathy with right-wing politics – I am equally hostile toward nationalism, fascism, and all other conservative ideologies created in the name of preserving law and order. I recognize that both left and right wing ideologies are fundamentally collectivist, requiring the absorption of individual freedom in exchange for the uniformity of a republic. Both sides of the political spectrum integrate people into a binary interpretation of reality that ultimately maintains industrial society.”

A Dagger of Feral Anarchy pdf

Why Nihilism? A Response to John Zerzans “Why Hope? (Critique of the Nihilist tendency in Anarchism)”

From back cover:

“The electioneering of hope and countless other political promises may captivate some, but not all. In the case of this text, I’m pointing out that some discover freedom in the total abandonment of positive politics ­ including the “utopian future” tied to it like a carrot. For some, nihilism is the pursuit of creating moments of bliss here and now with the rubble of burned down slaughterhouses, the cartloads of retail theft, the spontaneous attacks against fascism and so on. Some nihilists do more than just look at the stars; some enjoy the night sky from the rooftops of squatted buildings, the sunrise from moving freight trains, or the thunderstorms during night­time property destruction.”

Why Nihilism_A (Friendly) Response to John Zerzan pdf

Arming Negativity: Towards the Queerest Attack

From back cover:

“My queerness is an experimentation that never ends. It is the totality of a life lived against the law, insubordinate and wild. It is not a communist politics but a nihilist negation to all systems that attempt to subordinate individuality. It is not the leftist politics of demanding and “building a better world” but an anarchist insurgency of reclaiming life day to day, and setting fire to its captors. Since gender is embedded in every fabric of this industrial, civilized society, I find no hope in salvaging any part of it­ only joy in every second of its calculated demise.”

Arming Negativity_Towards the Queerest Attack pdf

Vegan Means Attack: Fomenting A Wildfire Against Speciesism and Moral Anthropocentrism

From back cover:

“There is a war to be waged against society, alongside the non-human animals who refuse domesticated subservience, and who are evicted from their homes due to mass deforestation, human development and technology. Veganism burdened by the millstone of liberalism, fails to critically acknowledge capitalist, industrial civilization itself as the massified, embodiment of anthropocentric domination. Anarchism that fails to challenge speciesism on an individual level reproduces the internalized authoritarian values of human domination. Since speciesism is pervasive in society, it is insulated and well preserved by a comforting normalization – a normalization that aids cultural indoctrination and apathy. Confrontation is necessary in unsettling the socially established comforts and moral order of non-human animal domination.”

Vegan Means Attack pdf

Anarchy: The Life and Joy of Insubordination

From back cover:

“Wage-slavery is the enemy of play, individuality, and freedom. Social systems require the subjugation of individuality to either homogenized membership or fixed group-identities in order to maintain their existence. With all social systems the formula is similar: individuality is surrendered to the group in order to be granted access to resources. Under capitalism, the wage-slave – or in Marxist terms, “the proletariat” – is an identity pre-configured with the role of reproducing capitalist society. This includes an individual surrendering their mind and body to a master in exchange for a wage that serves as the permission slip to access resources. But to the anarchist individual armed with the illegality of resource expropriation, anarchy is survival without permission.

Anarchy can not be experienced through history books, the reformation of work places nor the confines of a new societal system. Anarchy breathes with the rhythm of the wild in constant flux, ungoverned by anthropocentric laws and order. I rejoice my anarchy in the transformative abandonment of the role and identity of “the proletariat”. There is no great future revolution on the horizon to organize or wait for. There is only today, with no guarantee of tomorrow. There are no charismatic leaders to open the door to freedom. There is only the power of anarchist individuality defined by the liberating ammunition of desire.”

Anarchy_ The Life and Joy of Insubordination pdf

An Obituary for Identity Politics

From back cover:

“Rather than taking aim at identity itself and the apparatus maintaining this paradigm, energy is spent tearing one another down, ignoring the complexity of individual uniqueness, and playing the State’s role of defining each other based on membership to identity categories. Embracing a particular identity only reaffirms that identity’s existence as a ‘universal truth’ – and therefore, by the colonial intentions of assigned identity, the servitude and enslavement of some to others as a universal truth as well…

…I refuse to participate in upholding enslavement as a condition of my existence, and therefore these ‘truths’ are nothing more than political works of fiction…

…These ‘truths’ are the social constructs of control, keeping the life of rebellion shackled in a cold well of reform.”

An Obituary for Identity Politics pdf

Decomposing the Masses: Towards Armed Individuality

From back cover:

““The strategy of creating a mass society or system of order is a strategy of discouraging individuality, chaos, and uniqueness. This strategy includes presenting a one-dimensional view of individualism that is defined by capitalism. But for individualism to be unique and
chaotic, it can not be limited by the confines of formal organizations or socialized constructs.”

“I want to weaponize chaos as an individualized attack on all governance and social order. I envision anarchy as a wildfire that blackens the civilized, domesticated kingdom of institutional and social domination. Getting free is more than just attacking capital and the state. At least for me, it also means creating your self every single day beyond society’s attempts to define you as a static being.”

Decomposing the Masses_Towards Armed Individuality pdf

Descending into Madness: An Anarchist-Nihilist Diary of Anti-Psychiatry

From back cover:

“Like all governments, presidents, and authority, psychiatry never gave me freedom. Assigned psychiatric labels didn’t help me – they only filled me with an internalized sense of victimhood and inferiority. Medication didn’t ‘cure’ or ‘fix’ me – only damaged me, numbing me to my own senses in order to create an emotional void between me and the fuckery of civilized life. So instead, with nihilist celebration I descend into madness, taking aim at social order and civilization. With armed animalism I realize now that there was nothing to fix ­ my natural contempt for domestication and social control reminds me that I was never ‘broken’ to begin with.”

Descending into Madness_An Anarchist-Nihilist Diary of Anti-Psychiatry pdf

No Hope, No Future: Let the Adventures Begin!

From back cover:

“But this reality, however dismal, motivates my desire to make my life, through fierce revolt, as joyful and fulfilling as possible! My hopelessness does not paralyze me with fear or depression; I celebrate it with hysterical laughter and ecstasy in spite of civilization’s death march. I arm my desires with the urgency to live… against the social order of monotony and peaceful enslavement, to sleep beneath the stars, to feel sunshine and a breeze with every hair on my body, to listen to the late­-night conversations of the insects, to become wild…

No-Hope-No-Future_-Let-the-Adventures-Begin pdf

Prison Break: An Anarchist Blueprint for Hedonism

From back cover:

“Love and support to those who dropped out of school and faced life with nothing more than a lock­pick set and a backpack. Love and support to those who riot within the prisons of asylums and “correctional” facilities. Love and support to those who weaponized their lives, taking rebellion to their graves in choosing death over imprisonment. A howl to the lifestylist ex­-workers who found fierce joy in the materialized anarchy of their wildest
dreams.”

Prison Break_An Anarchist Blueprint for Hedonism pdf

Really Though, Not All “Black” People Give A Fuck About “White” Dreads

Text from back cover:

“Just ‘cus people share the same institutionalized form(s) of oppression don’t automatically mean they share the same visions and objectives on how to destroy it. These are important differences that shouldn’t be flattened. While these groups continue their mind-numbing attempts to create a new system of race essentialism within the shell of the old, some of us are having fun destroying all the systems. My anarchy is an existential expansion of individuality beyond the limitations of racial (and gendered) social constructs.”

Really though, not all black people give a fuck about white dreads pdf

What Savages We Must Be: Vegans Without Morality

From back cover:

“It is not a morality that governs my actions, but rather an individualist desire to wage war upon all systems, moral or not, that attempt to subjugate me and destroy the earth I require to survive. My decision to become vegan did not come from a vegan morality or a new law prohibiting me from consuming flesh and secretions. It came from ungoverned free thought which helped me view society in a critical way, discovering pragmatic ways of enacting my own project of liberation. My vegan anarchist praxis is a shared affinity with the non­humans who fight against the constraints and torture devices of modern technology, slaughterhouses, and the human­made hell of industrial society. There is no God, government, or morality to save us. Only our individual selves, the decisions we make and the actions we take.”

What Savages We Must Be Vegans Without Morality pdf